IS ANYBODY LISTENING?

IS ANYBODY LISTENING?

Can you hear me, are you listening?

I know I'm still the same inside

I get muddled and confused 

and I know I remember everything

sometimes, on some days, somehow…

So, I don't know whether I've taken my tablet,

nor can I remember having breakfast

but I remember the soft, still light of dawn.. 

I remember greeting you for the first time

holding you in my arms, it was you, wasn't it

born on a still autumn morn, 

dark haired and with the tiniest fingers..

It was you, your mother cradling you in her arms

looking even more beautiful than ever..

and crying, I remember the tears, 

her tears, for her own mother would never hold you, 

never share her dreams for you.

I'm sorry I asked you that same thing so many times

but I can't remember your answer 

for more than a moment, maybe two

… will you be home for dinner? 

What time did you say, when… when will you be home?

Have I taken my tablet? I can't remember…

But I do remember your mother's beautiful voice

as she sang an Irish Lullaby

was that to you or one of the others…

maybe to all of you, each of you, others.

What will I cook for dinner, when will you be home?

Please don't get angry, I can't remember

When will you be home?

What's for dinner? Is it ready, am I cooking?

Who cooked dinner, when will you be home…

I can hear my voice, I know I can't remember

but I haven't forgotten the laughter

that wonderful, gentle laughter that ended in a burst of sound, 

then tears rolling down her cheeks when she couldn't stop.

Where's your mother, I can't find her

Please bring her home, where's your mother now?

I need to talk to her, where is she? 

tell her I'm waiting for her… will she be back soon?

I need her… 

is anybody listening?

© Crissouli 2013